carrie的独立作文2.1

carriexuUID: 2559756

2.1 Do the movies and television have more negative effect than positive effect on the young people?Nowadays，movies and televisions are part of the young people’s life.After work,watching television is the first choice for most of them to relax.When dating with friends,they usually go to the cinema.However,some people argue that the movies and  televisions have more negative effect on the young people because the young learns many bad behaviours from the movies and TV programmes, such as using dirty words ,gambling ,and imitating the same crime methods .However,from my prospective,I don’t agree with them.I believe that the movies and televisions bring more advantages rather than disadvantages to the young people.
Firstly,movies and TV programmes are important sources for the young people to learn knowledge and gain information.Differing from the knowledge in the classroom,the knowledge popularized on the televisions is more easy for the young to accept, because the young are always attracted by the vivid images and sound.Take my own experience as example.I once watched a TV programme,telling history stories, when I was a high school student.In the program,some actors recreated the event ,which made us feel that we were present at the scene. This programme brought me a lot of inspirations  because my worst subject was history in high school．It really a hard task for me remember so many dates and people of events.What’s worse,I always feel sleepy when I read history books.However,this program was so fascinating that it arose my interest in history.With the help of these programme,I feel much easier to learn history.In my opinion,sometimes the TV programs seem to be the best teachers for the young people.
Secondly,the movies and televisions make young people communicate with each other much easier.As we known,some movies or TV series will become popular topics among young people.People focusing on the same programmes usually have more feelings to share.Take my brother’s experience as example.My brother is a fiction movie fan.When he went to the middle school for the first time,he met a boy,who is his favourite friend now.They began talking just because my brother mentioned a fiction movie he watched before.The boy was a fiction movie fan too.Even though their favourite films were different,they still talked a lot about flims they had seen.They even watched a film together on the first day they met.
To sum up,I admit that the movies and TV programmes have some negative effects on the people,but we must learned that the causes of the the young people’ incorrect behaviours consist of comprehensive and complicated factors.Therefore，we shouldn’t ascribe most responsibilities to movies and TV programmes.Furthermore,the society should provide more great movies and wonderful TV programmes for the young people.

carriexuUID: 2559756

这个超时好多。。。

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

2.1 Do the movies and television have more negative effect than positive effect on the young people? Nowadays，movies and televisions are part of the young people’s life. After work,watching television is the first choice for most of them to relax.When dating with friends, they usually go to the cinema.However,some people argue that the movies and  televisions have more negative effect on the young people because the young learns many bad behaviours from the movies and TV programmes, such as using dirty words ,gambling ,and imitating the same crime methods .However,from my prospective,I don’t agree with them.I believe that the movies and televisions bring more advantages rather than disadvantages to the young people. (开头不错，直奔主题) Firstly,movies and TV programmes are important sources for the young people to learn knowledge and gain information.Differing from the knowledge in the classroom,the knowledge popularized on the televisions is more easy for the young to accept, because the young are always attracted by the vivid images and sound.Take my own experience as example.I once watched a TV programme,telling (about) history stories, when I was a high school student (这句意思有点绕).In the program,some actors recreated (reconstructed) the event ,which made us feel that we were present at the scene. This programme brought me a lot of inspirations  because my worst subject was history in high school (这句的逻辑明显是中文的逻辑，老美看了会感觉奇怪，什么叫“这个节目给我带来灵感，因为我历史最差”？ 不知道这么改会不会好一些：This program improved my memory about historical evens, which also benefited my worst suject (history) in high school.)．(Actually) It (was) really a hard task for me (to) remember so many dates and people of events. What’s worse,I always feel sleepy when I read history books.However,this program was so fascinating that it arose my interest in history.With the help of these programme,I feel much easier to learn history.In my opinion,sometimes the TV programs seem to be the best teachers for the young people. Secondly,the movies and televisions make young people communicate with each other much easier.As we known,some movies or TV series will become popular topics among young people.People focusing on the same programmes usually have more feelings to share.Take my brother’s experience as example.My brother is a fiction movie fan.When he went to the middle school for the first time,he met a boy,who is his favourite friend now.They began talking just because my brother mentioned a fiction movie he watched before.The boy was a fiction movie fan too.Even though their favourite films were different,they still talked a lot about flims they had seen.They even watched a film together on the first day they met.(两句的句式会不会重复了？) To sum up,I admit that the movies and TV programmes have some negative effects on the people,but we must learned that the causes of the the young people’ incorrect behaviours consist of comprehensive and complicated factors.Therefore，we shouldn’t ascribe most responsibilities to movies and TV programmes.Furthermore,the society should provide more great movies and wonderful TV programmes for the young people.(结尾总结得很全面，不错) 除了一些句子上面的掌握程度以及陈述逻辑上的混乱，另外有些句子太“碎”，明明可以一句话说完的事情，分成太多句子了，如果这样的话就要考虑句式变化的问题，可是有些句子的变化显然不够，让人感到重复， 除此之外，LZ的这篇文章很不错，理由充分，不乏例子，开头结尾照应得不错！ Good job!

carriexuUID: 2559756

我也感觉inspirition那很别扭，但是也没想出来怎么改。。。句式变化一直让我很头疼！
谢谢修改啦